Dating and Divorcing are equally scary on their own, let alone having to attempt one after the other! I have two very close friends of mine, actually I know a few more people than that, but a number of similarities have occurred with them all as they returned to the dating scene. As I am not divorced all I can do is imagine the situation or look at it with an objective view. On the other hand my heart has been broken and I’ve returned the favor and broken a few more. It is not my intention to upset anyone just to give my feedback on what I have seen and experienced in my own life. Hopefully these tips will be of some use to you or a friend you know!
Talking Continuously About Your Ex Husband Or Wife.
This is what you have your friends for, its probably not a conversation to have with a potential soul mate. Talking about negative or positive occurrences regarding your Ex is probably going to show your date that you don’t really care about him or her and that your still in love with you’re Ex whether you care to admit it or not. If this happens or has happened to you, maybe your not ready for the dating scene, you could have a lot of healing to undergo, a relationship expert maybe someone you can speak to. A professional in this area could help you prepare for a new relationship.
Sleeping With Your Date On The First Night
No one is calling any one names around here, but have some decency and respect yourself, you are probably a really great person, I don’t even know you but I bet you have loads of good qualities to share and offer anyone in your surroundings. Don’t give it up on the first go!
Going home with someone after having a few too many drinks
Typically the same as above but this one has a dangerous side to it. Under the influence of alcohol or other drugs, whatever the case maybe, we are certainly not coherent of our surroundings. Sometimes we fail to get one foot in front of the other eventually stumbling to the floor with the results of a bruise or two. What if you can’t get one foot in front of the other if you happen to go home with wrong person from a pub or bar? Its frightening but it happens. Keeping safe while you are out applies to everyone divorced, dating, single or not. If you go out with a group of friends make sure everyone leaves together!
Introducing your Date to your children on the first night.
Your children will be suffering just as much as you. For a child to accept and understand a new person in Mum or Dad’s life will be difficult. Give yourself time as well to make sure you and your new friend have the potential for long term love. After a while if you feel you really have a connection with this new person you should probably talk to your children first, and gage their reaction, then discuss this with your new partner. This will allow you to arm yourself with the best resources.
Personal Items Of Your Ex In Your Bedroom
HHHHHmmmmmm! Well I’m not saying that you need to destroy every last memory of your Ex but leaving items like photos and jewelery next to your pillow might not be the best idea. Instead you might be better to put the items in a more private place, if there are children involved then a photo of mum or dad next to their bed is more appropriate but not yours! If you are on your own it may also be a good time to clear out your Ex’s belongings.
In Your Heart Expecting This Person To Be Like Your Ex
You now have an Ex for a reason. This person and everything about him or her is no longer apart of your life, unless children are involved of course, then you will have to maintain a civil relationship but romantically with this person, this part of your life has finished. As hard as this maybe for you to cope with, you need to know that you have many more things to look forward too in your life and it is time to let go. Honestly this new person is never going to be exactly like your Ex and with good reasons that are personal to you. Eventually you are going to have new friends, new social circles and probably some new interests or hobbies. When you go out on your next date, give your affection and interest to the person sitting across or next to you, because you never know what may unfold before your very eyes, heart and soul.
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